MSCC MAY 17 FEATURE FIVE FOR FRIDAY: FIVE GOOD WAYS TO GET INTO A FISTFIGHT AT A CAR SHOW

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The world of car shows is typically a beautiful place where people mingle freely and the world is similar to that ancient Coke commercial where a crowd is singing their hearts out (in perfect harmony) to the idealized song ‘I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing’.

Right up until it’s not a harmonious place and a problem arises at the automotive festivities.

There can be conflict at a show and MyStarCollectorCar would like to list five of the problems that may occasionally arise at these events.

The first issue that may occur at a show is any occasion where an onlooker’s kids use the vintage vehicles for a playground. The vehicle in question may have been through a painfully expensive restoration where the investment costs would cover the debt in smaller underdeveloped nations. A scratch or dent in the car or truck’s finish is not a great building block to a conversation with the owners because they have invested heavily in their beloved vehicle and will understandably treat this situation in the same fashion as a parent when their kids were slapped across the head by a stranger. A stranger who may even be a vintage vehicle owner.

The second issue that may arise at a show is any mutt with uncontrollable bladder and territorial issues that chooses to mark the nearest tire in their canine version of Facebook. Expensive tires built to reflect a bygone era with a generously wide whitewall, cool redlines, or raised letters, are not included in a mutt’s decision process when he decides to use a collector vehicle’s tires as part of his message board about who is the big dog on the porch.

The dog’s uninformed reaction to an expensive vintage tire reproduction is understandable from a simple canine’s perspective, but the mutt’s owner needs to keep Fido on a short leash at a car show–unless the dog is smarter than its owner. Occasionally that will happen, by the way.

The third issue that may arise is unwanted criticism of the vintage vehicle. Some onlookers believe they have the right to insult the owner and his or her vintage ride at a show. These armchair critics have brought nothing to the show except a bad attitude and zero knowledge about the history behind a particular vintage vehicle.

All these tactless clowns really need to know is pretty simple: the owner is very proud of his or her vehicle–plus they took the time and paid out of their own pocket to bring it to the show. On the other hand, the classless critics went to the show, don’t even own a vintage ride, and did not even have to pay an admission fee in most cases.

The fourth issue that irritates car show participants are really stupid questions directed their way by people who clearly have no evidence to prove they have a car guy’s heart, soul, mechanical skills, and basic knowledge of the vehicle in question. Bear in mind that MyStarCollectorCar is zeroing in on adult males with the number four irritant because most car guys are taken aback when the dumb questions come from this particular group of people.

The fifth and final source of severe irritation is any situation where the aforementioned onlooker chooses not to listen to the owner’s story. Instead these geniuses take the unlucky owner on an obnoxious and pointless trip down memory lane where they describe a dead relative’s vehicle that was not even the year, make and model of the vintage car in front of them. Obvious newsflash here: this grim scenario is not welcomed by the owner.

However, MyStarCollectorCar is pleased to report that most car shows are largely attended by people who respect and admire the vehicles at the show, so we would highly recommend attending a car show. However, the misfortune lottery means there is a chance some of the aforementioned five sources of irritation may be at the same show.

Our advice? Try very hard not be one of one of the infamous five.

BY: Jim Sutherland

Jim Sutherland is a veteran automotive writer whose work has been published by many major print and online publications. The list includes Calgary Herald, The Truth About Cars, Red Deer Advocate, RPM Magazine, Edmonton Journal, Montreal Gazette, Windsor Star, Vancouver Province, and Post Media Wheels Section. 

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