New car names are a lot like new cars—bland and uninspiring.
Sure, there are exceptions but most of today’s car names are cranked out of a Madison Avenue grinder that says, ‘sound profound–but say nothing’.
That isn’t the case with the following car names.
Jerry Sutherland
The first example is the 1951 Kaiser Vagabond. The Vagabond was a unique car because it was an early version of an SUV-hatchback. Kaiser was a high-tech company pumping out quality cars, but innovation could only take you so far in the car-building game.
They were well-built and well-engineered, and the Vagabond name implied freedom. Unfortunately, a vagabond today is more likely to be the slumped-over druggie panhandling in your local grocery store parking lot.
The Plymouth Cricket is another great example of unique car names. This was a car aimed directly at female buyers because no dude wanted to arrive at football practice in a car called a Cricket. You’d have to be the toughest guy on the team.
They were British-built imports designed for fuel economy, but the build quality, rust issues, and oil burning engines doomed the little Crickets to a short paragraph in Chrysler’s history.
Believe it or not, the same car was sold as the Hillman Avenger in Britain. The name was tougher, but the car wasn’t.
The mighty 70-horsepower Avenger suffered the same fate as its dainty cousin, the anemic 70-horsepower Cricket. No matter how far apart two car names are on the tough guy spectrum, the car itself will always be judged by its insta-rust body and chronic blue smoke out of the tailpipe.
The Hudson Super Wasp was another unique car name from the past. This car was an offshoot of the legendary Hudson Hornet, so it packed some punch under the hood.
The name was clearly an ad guy’s idea born after a six-martini lunch. In other words, if the Hornet was a legendary performer—then (in his world) a Super Wasp would be an incredible machine. Hopefully, he kept his job after his historically significant liquid lunch.
The Kaiser Golden Dragon was another example. The Dragon began as a trim option in 1951, but by 1953 the Dragon became a car name.
Kaiser didn’t sell many of these classics because they were fully loaded, upscale cars plus the Kaiser name was circling the drain by ‘53. But not before they pumped out a car called the Dragon—that’s a pretty cool exit strategy.
The final name is a new one—the Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard. This car stands out–but not for its cutting-edge engineering or trend setting style. No, the Isuzu Mysterious Wizard stand out for its baffling name.
This name can only be explained by a scenario where a bunch of guys were heading into the weekend on a Friday afternoon and they needed a placeholder car name by 5 pm. It got by the gatekeepers on Monday morning and a legend was born.
Simple lesson. There’s still hope for car names in 2026.
Jerry Sutherland
By: Jerry Sutherland
Jerry Sutherland is a veteran automotive writer with a primary focus on the collector car hobby. His work has been published in many outlets and publications, including the National Post, Calgary Herald, Edmonton Journal, Ottawa Citizen, Montreal Gazette, Saskatoon StarPhoenix, Regina Leader-Post, Vancouver Sun and The Truth About Cars. He is also a regular contributor to Auto Roundup Publications.
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